An Update On My Life

So to answer the big question: Trent and I are still in Minnesota.  We did not go back to Tyler, Tx to do YWAM's SOE.  As we drew close to the beginning date of the school, a couple friends and I went on a fast to hear God speak about SOE.  I don't know why I didn't blog during those three days, because I really learned a lot about fasting and about trusting in God.  But the conclusion of it was that God asked me to stay here.  SOE would happen, but not right now.  Right now, He gave me the priority of "restoring relationships" although I'm not fully sure what that means yet.  I probably won't know for sure until this season of my life is done.  I have my ideas, but I know my God, and usually does things much bigger than my ideas. 
I have been struggling with being here.  I have been missing Texas a lot.  I miss worshiping God everyday with a large group of people who love Him so intensely everyday.  I miss being in a place where I'm not weird for trusting fully in God and doing crazy things with my life for Him.  I miss learning so much about Him everyday.  Its hard to be here and see things on Facebook from my DTS classmates continuing with SOE.  But I do trust in God, and I know His timing is perfect.  He has been very encouraging: 

April 2:  "Accept the way God does things..." ~Ecclesiastes 7:13

April 9:  "I will be filled with joy because of you.  I will sing praises to your name, O Most High." ~Psalm 9:2

April 10:  "The LORD says,'I will guide you along the best pathway for your life.  I will advise you and watch over you.  Do not be like the senseless horse or mule that needs a bit and bridle to keep it under control.'...unfailing love surrounds those who trust the LORD." ~Psalm 32:8-10

April 11:  "Just as you cannot understand the path of the wind or the mystery of a tiny baby growing in its mother's womb, so you cannot understand the activity of God, who does all things." ~Ecclesiastes 11:5 

I have such a good God :)  How crazy to live a life being so fully loved by Him.
I know that I am where I am supposed to be.  And I get new revelations of why I am here almost everyday.  For example, if I was down in Texas, I wouldn't get to be with Kelsey.  I wouldn't have gotten to have an amazing night with her last night.  I wouldn't have gotten to see a very literal and real "beauty from ashes" analogy.  Again, I have such a good God.  It still amazes me to look back to where Kelsey and I were before DTS.  Standing with her, staring at the fire burning a past of journals, notes, and pictures that are no longer a part of her, all I could think about was how blessed I was to be standing there with her, how blessed I am that God made a crazy friendship between two people who could have never become friends on their own.  I'm ok with staying in the world and just being in it with her until God opens the next door for us. 
I know what God has said.  I trust in Him.  I trust in the crazy love He has for me.  Jesus, help me to fall as in love with you as you are with me.  I will continue to seek you everyday.  And I know the YWAM experience is not over yet.